Things I have Quit

• Sin. Ok, not really. I would like to be a bit more sinful and then maybe I'd quit it. And by sinful, I mean bathing in a bath of chocolate and drinking it (Gluttony and Greed - honestly, I'm not sure there's a difference for me), lazing around all day and demanding that people (for the purpose of this exercise, let's call Albert, "people") wait on me hand and foot (Sloth*), feeling super proud of my one-eyed cat for not giving up in the face of extreme adversity** (Pride), cussing people out for their poor driving skills (Wrath), wishing that all the girls that have the mermaid long hair that I want will suddenly develop alopecia (Envy) and, well I can't describe the last one in case my Mum reads this.  Let's just think of it as the way I feel about cake - Lust.
• Sugar. Think we all know this but it's a really good way to remind everyone how self-sacrificing I am, how virtuous I am and how dedicated. 47 days sugar-free. Basically I am better than everyone else. Please make it end soon...
• Pottery class. I thought I was going to be really good at this. Unfortunately it was stupid.
• Horse riding. Three times is enough in anyone's life. I have a way with animals. Just not horses.
• Manners. F&^% off.
• Potatoes. Because they're considered naughty on the Glycemic Index. Fries are totally fine though. And if you add something to your potato, you're golden. The GI is pretty clear that it's just plain potatoes. #Loophole
• Using turn signal (indicator). No one else does in America. I just imagine where I think they are going and sometimes I am right. But mostly not. Tricky little bastards.
• Ballet. But not because I'm terrible at it. For anyone who has seen me move gracefully through life, I think it's pretty obvious that I am very talented. I just quit cos.
• Worrying***
• Dating. Or more specifically trying to meet men. Let them come to me. "Release the hounds men!!"
• Teaching Albert. Anything. He's made it pretty clear that it's his way or the highway. Plus he lets me live here so I try and keep the peace. 

 *Is it considered Sloth if you have a baby sloth, swathed in a blanket?  Cos, I've seen some of those on YouTube lately and I want one. Yes, I know - Greed.  
**He's disabled but you won't see him collecting a disability pension.  He works for a living.

He's a man of action - just look at the focus.

See?  Always on the go, this one.

***Don't be ridiculous. If I stop worrying about things then my OCDness and control issues might go away and I need them