How A Bucket Stops A Cat From Pooping Indoors

When I have a problem, I quickly admit defeat and wait for someone to fix it. And no one does so then I have to. And while conceptually my ideas are great, the execution and the practicality of them have varying results.  Varying from bad to terrible.

For the last couple of months since it got really hot, Albert has taken to randomly doing his business in the hallway. And no amount of questioning will get me any answers. So, I did a little detective work. Which didn't help. At first I thought it was because he was too scared to go outside on garbage collection day. An unwelcome surprise the following day disproved that theory. Then I thought he was too scared to go out his little window on the day the gardeners came. Once again, I was proved wrong.

But I think I've cracked it. Right after I stood in it. Directly above the cat window is the upstairs neighbors' air conditioning unit. Once it started to get hotter, they turned it on and since the guy works from home, it's on for most of the day. And it drips. Onto Albert's carpeted platform where he enters and exits. And I think, my precious has gotten a little bit precious about getting his paws and butt wet. Never mind that he happily frolics in the rain, god forbid he should have to step on sodden carpeting for mere seconds. I want to use a phrase right now that rhymes with "whittle shucker".

My first attempt to fix the problem was to put a container out there - unfortunately the drips come down directly above the cat window so that then means he can't come and go.So, I spent a lot of time at work thinking about the problem, sketching solutions and doing some extensive measurements and calculations.*

So I've come up with a homemade solution, that is a brilliant example of the well-known phenomenon "kiwi ingenuity".

That's right, I wired a bucket to the mosquito screen so that it's above the cat door and below the air conditioner.  Am currently waiting for them to turn on AC so I can see if it catches the drops and the carpet below stays dry...yes, my cat has carpet on his outdoor ladder.  Why?

It's quite a long way below the A/C but since my other thought was to somehow have it evaporate before it hit the ground and science has yet to catch up with my brain and invent something, I think this will have to do.

 I am aware there are flaws - like having to take my stool** outside so I can reach up and untie the bucket to empty it.  Also there is a very high potential that the weight of the water will rip the screen out of the window before I can get to it to empty.  

Therefore, I am offering a reward to anyone who can come up with a better solution.  Your prize: a well-trained house broken(ish) one-eyed cat. 

*Not actually true. I just said fuck a lot.
**Pun intended