Oh, right like you don't know that song.
This past weekend, I did something very brave. I organized a neighborhood get-together. It was very brave of me. Mostly because I don't like people. But I belong to this things called nextdoor.com which might just be for the West Hollywood area or it might be world-wide. Basically people post comments/advice on what things have been stolen from them*, the best dog walkers, painters, house cleaners and call out people who have parked badly. And it seemed a little ridiculous that with all this sharing going on, no one has actually met anyone else and we should all get completely hammered together**. So I did. They weren't as good as it as me.
I gave everyone 3 weeks notice so no one could come up with a lame last minute excuse. Not that it bothered some people. I would like to thank all the elderly people that came out. Young people these days have no manners. OId is where it is. It's because they don't have cell phones so they feel like they have to show up.
It was an ok turnout for a first meeting. Not as many hot single guys as I'd been hoping for. But you can only go up from zero, right? A lot of single older women, think they had the same idea as me but everyone knows that as host you get first pick. First pick of nothing is...well, that's a lot of math but I think 8.
As I sat there nursing my cider***, I congratulated myself on doing this and getting it out of the way. Time for someone else to take charge, I'd done my bit for community spirit. These people will get no more out of me. I was quite firm on that, as only I can be. So next month I will be organizing a pot-luck BBQ at a park.
*I am surprised that people are suprised that the unlocked bike that they paid thousands for so that they could be Ironman champion of the world has been stolen from their backyard. Maybe it's because here this is a nation of people shooting people whereas New Zealand is a nation of people stealing the rug out from under you. That was my little soapbox rant about the ridiculous gun laws and amount of unnecessary shootings that there are in this country. Honestly, theft is a much better problem to have. I'm also surprised that thieves are perfectly ok with just getting a portion of the bike. There are a lot of extra wheels out there and I'm thinking a lot of burglars that use a unicycle to make their getaway.
**This used to be my brother's approach to a new job, get hammered the first week with your new co-workers, show them your break-dancing moves and act like nothing happened on Monday.
***I'm on a cider kick this summer. Despite being there for 3 hours, they all only stuck with the one drink so I had to strike a deal with the waitress that involved slipping me ciders on the sly. Apparently it was because they had to walk home. Exactly the opposite reason why I thought having more than one was a good idea. Drinking and walking totally mix. I looked both ways when crossing the road and only had a conversation with one inanimate object.
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