Great Invention Ideas I have Had

• This Blog
• Velcro Wall Wardrobe - this one's a winner. Pretty sure there's going to be rush on velcro after work tonight. Wallpaper a wall in your room with the prickly side of velcro, sew a small piece of the fuzzy side to all your clothes. Instead of having to hang them up, just throw them at the wall. You're welcome.

Solving two problems at a time:

• Fat stations - if we could power our cars by sucking the fat out of people you could just pull into a fat station, hook yourself up to a fat volunteer, fill up with fat. You get free fuel, fat person gets thin. No more pollution, no more obesity. Genius.
• Feed the fat people to the hungry. No more obesity, no more starving people. World Problem's No.4 and 5 - cracked it.
• Using the skins off garbanzo beans (chickpeas) as contact lenses. I'm like Fred Hollows but without any qualifications. Or skills. Also I don't save Australian eyes*

Plenty more where this came from.  A can.  $1.43.

• I just had this idea today after my third ever yoga class last night.  Now that I'm a yoga teacher,** I think I'll open a yoga studio and have everyone just show up with their mats, unroll them, then...nap.  It's a different style of yoga.  New.  Its origins are from my head.  You should stay in the nap pose for an hour.
• I can't tell you in case you steal it for yourself. 

*Look him up.  Try and ignore the part about where he defected from NZ to Australia and focus on the good he did.  The Australians take all our good stuff - pavlova, Crowded House, Phar Lap, meat pies, the electric fence, spreadable butter, probably our sheep.  Then they turn around and try and give us their crap in exchange - prisoners (and pass them off as citizens), possums, spiders of a ridiculous size.  Probably cholera and plague (there's no evidence online because they stole the internet too). 
**Self-appointed.  The nap part is just until I learn more than Downward Dog.  Is fetal position, a position?  I'm good at that.  I practice for the bear attacks.