Wednesday, September 4, 2013

A Handful Of the Conversations I Regularly Have...

This is probably going to offend some people. And by people I mean Americans. Which means my readership may drop back down to 3. So, I'm going to need the New Zealander's to step it up a bit until I can get the Americans back. What do you say we all pick on the Aussies tomorrow?

Stupid person: Are you from Australia?
Me: No, New Zealand
Stupid Person: Yeah, I thought I recognized the accent
Me: Probably right after I told you

Different stupid person: Where are you from?
Me: New Zealand
Still stupid person but still different one: Oh cool, that’s next to Sweden, right?
Me: No, that’s Norway.

Blind drunk stupid person: Have you seen a hobbit?
Me: Yes.

Stupid Person: Do you eat turkey for Thanksgiving in New Zealand or something else?
Me: The Mayflower didn't make it to us, so...

Stupid Person: Are you going home to New Zealand for the weekend?
Me: Yes. I have a time travel portal
Stupid Person: Really?
Me: No.

Stupid Person: Has anyone ever said "throw another shrimp on the barbie" to you?
Me: No - that's so original. Did you think of that by yourself? 


Culturally Unaware person: Why do New Zealander's call themselves a fruit?
Me: The nickname comes from a bird called the Kiwi
Culturally Unaware person: Have you eaten a Kiwi
Me: Yes, it was roasting next to the shrimp on the barbie
Culturally Unaware person: Does it taste like chicken?







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8 comments:

  1. AaronSeptember 4, 2013 at 2:59 PM

    Are you guys the "freesh feesh" people or the "frush fush" people?

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousSeptember 4, 2013 at 3:56 PM

    haha, I love this. Some questions I get:

    Me: i'm from Toronto, Canada
    Clueless person: Canada... do you know (insert name)?
    Clueless person 2: Do you have a 4th of July?
    Me: yes, and we have a 5th of July, too

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. kafin13September 4, 2013 at 3:59 PM

      I love it! I forgot about the "Do you know X?"

      Delete
  3. WriteOfGenghisSeptember 5, 2013 at 2:34 AM

    SpecialK, do you know my dentist? Technically he's a Chiwi, (Chinese-kiwi) so it's possible you don't. But if you do, can you put in a kind word? Thanks.

    BTW, loved the scenery in Croc Dundee, your homeland looks amazing

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. kafin13September 5, 2013 at 9:26 AM

      G'day mate - I"m told that New Zealand is 20 years behind the rest of of the world so I really hope that isn't going to impact your dental work.

      Delete
  4. UnknownSeptember 9, 2013 at 5:02 PM

    Ha ha ha!
    This so reminds me of Flight of the Conchords!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. kafin13September 9, 2013 at 8:47 PM

      That's pretty much the highest of compliments - thanks!

      Delete

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