Retouching of Photos

Retouching of photos is a big deal these days - there's a lot of controversy over magazines doing unnecessary editing that serves to make the rest of us feel like we will never attain these standards of perfection. Retouching is done for a variety of reasons - in the fashion world, it's to make models look thinner, have more perfect skin, hair and legs that go on for miles. In other industries, it's to create a certain look that simply wasn't available to be captured at the time or to add a prop that enhances the message they're trying to get across. Below are some examples of where it all went terribly wrong:

When thumbs just want to do their own thing...

When the top part of your leg is optional...

When you won't let go of that special someone...

I love all of Adam Levine and I respectfully ask that you give him back his right side.

Auditioned for Exorcist. Didn't get it...

Now we all feel a little better about ourselves. Oops, I did it again - said something mean...

Hi - can someone help me? My hand fell off at the wrist...

You're probably wondering why I felt the need to write about such a lighthearted topic given the usual seriousness and complexity of my regular posts, particularly in light of the Government shutdown today. Which I would have written about if I knew what it was about. Buy, Buy, Sell, Sell! Yes?

So, the reason for all this is a cunning self-promotion gambit, in addition to all the money coming in from the blog, I've decided to offer another service - Photo Retouching. Feel free to send in your photos if you need some assistance. I think at $1087/photo, you'll find my rates reasonable, especially when you see the quality of the work in my portfolio samples below.

In this photo, I've accentuated the blue of my eyes and made the lips a little pinker to add some color to the photo - they're subtle differences but they enhance the overall quality of the snapshot for a more natural look.

To showcase the nature aspect of this photo, the toenails were touched up to tone down the blue and replace them with a color that blends better with the butterfly. It really puts the focus back on the insect so that everything else becomes more muted. You can hardly see that there are people in the pool..

In this holiday picture, it's clear that I didn't get there in a car - although on occasion, I wear a helmet in a car. Safety first. The photographer obviously wasn't able to fit the bike in the photo so I took the liberty of cleverly sketching an exact replica to provide some context for anyone looking at it and wondering what is going on.

I took the opportunity in this photo to give myself a trimmer figure by shaving off my sides and blending the colors for a near impossible image of perfection. I also added a belt and some modesty.

Call me.